[When they'd been at home, before all of this, late nights had been typical for Noctis. Staying up late and sleeping in even later was just the way his body seemed to want things. Here was no different. Except instead of staying up playing video games he was laying in the darkness writing notes on his tablet.]
Dude, it's me What's up? Having a hard time sleeping?
right right the prince of sleep is awake you got me 😝
but yeah i guess i was just going through some pics thinking about home and other stuff
[ there's a long pause before he says anything else, staring hard at the pics on his camera and practically aching from the sight of them. back home, he'd started looking at them sometimes when he felt homesick or lonely, but after a while, he couldn't bring himself to do it. not when it meant remembering that noct was gone and the world was a hellscape. ]
uh huh guess i'll have to change your name in my contacts list then
[ because he asked, prompto sends one where he's scrawled happy birthday along the top with the pen function. and the next few messages he gets cause him to snort a little. ]
i could probably give you something i'd just have to get creative about it unless you wanna tell me what you want
[Okay honestly? That's the best present he ever could have gotten. He instantly saves it, and makes it the background on his tablet. They all look so happy. And that's how he wants to remember their journey. For all the good times. Not for how it ended.]
You just did It's kind of chilly tonight though I could use some help keeping warm
[ he's just kidding though. it's actually just 'noct' – plain and simple. and if he likes that pic, he's got a bunch of others he'll have to edit and send to him. maybe tomorrow though, glancing up from his seat in the direction of the room noct is resting in. ]
[Actually that's a lie. He moves little. Enough to make room for Prompto to lay in the bed next to him. To give up half of his pillow. Clearly someone is feeling generous tonight.
[ noct's text draws the smallest smile out of him, carefully making his way across the room once he enters and tucking his lantern under the edge of the bed so the light isn't terribly bright. not that it is on its own, but prompto also doesn't want to trip over it if they have to get up in a hurry. then, quietly, he sits on the edge of the mattress and wiggles his way under the blanket they're apparently going to share. ]
Man, you weren't kidding. It is a little cold in here. [ he whispers it, gently nudging noct as he settles in. ]
[Honestly, it's pretty pitch black in their room. Considering Noct's lantern has seemingly taken up permanent residence in the kitchen when ever he's home. Who ever would have thought sleeping so much would actually have a positive effect?
He's stolen an extra blanket from somewhere and thrown it over the bed, so it's at least pretty cozy once Prom slips under the covers. It helps with Noct arches into him, the response almost instant.]
Yeah. Plus it's... kind of hard to fall asleep by myself now after spending all that time squished in with you guys.
[ it's so surreal that for a split second, prompto doesn't know where he is. is he back home crammed into a caravan with his three friends? is he alone somewhere in the middle of eos with only his memories of noct to keep him company? is he dead in beacon with his best friend trying to spoon him? he doesn't know, and for several long moments, he doesn't breathe. this should be second nature by now, sharing a space with noct because they'd been sharing their space for ages, but after a few years of going it alone... he's hesitant to move, trying to push down the weird bubble of fear in his chest so he can casually throw an arm over noct's hip and lean in. ]
On the bright side, at least we're not sleeping in a tent on the cold, hard ground. [ sharing noct's one pillow is going to get tricky if he isn't careful about where he rests his head. he gives noct's side a squeeze. ] Better?
[Somewhere inside of his brain, the very real and rational thought that this isn't normal for Prompto anymore rears it's ugly head. Maybe this isn't the best way to try and make him feel like everything is okay. Does he even want things to be like they were?
But the habit was so hard for Noctis to break. Especially when he didn't have the aid of Prompto being ripped from him. There had never been anything such as personal space between them. They were always all over each other.]
And we don't have to listen to Gladio snore. [His own arm loops around Prompto's waist and he shifts closer. Just a bit. Just enough so they can make each other in the darkness.] I'm sorry I left you alone, Prom. But I'm here.
[ he's about to make some dorky retort to his comment about gladio when the rest of it comes, and it feels like the ground's been ripped out from under his feet. prompto wonders if noct can feel the way his heart suddenly races, how hard it is to swallow around the lump in his throat, and even though the room's pretty dark, he wishes he could just roll over and hide his face from him. he doesn't want to have this conversation right now. not when they're both tired, not when it's still the beginning of noct's birthday. ]
Noct... [ what does he say? what should he say? it's fine, i'm probably crazy anyway doesn't seem like a good thing to blurt out, and he miraculously catches himself before he does. ] You don't have to be sorry. I still had the others. We were doing okay.
[ barely. and he couldn't even remember when the last time was he'd seen ignis and gladio, but that's something he definitely doesn't want to tell noct. ]
Was it even really his fault? Since when had he ever been in control of which path fate forced him down? Maybe it was selfish to feel so responsible for the deaths of those he loved. To feel like he had failed.
Had failed to save Luna. Had been so weak that Ignis had sacrificed himself in some last ditch attempt to save him. Hadn't been there for Prompto when the darkness came and he needed him most.
And he wants to say all of that. But he doesn't. Because it probably isn't the right time. And it probably never will be.]
I know how strong you are, Prompto. I'm just... really glad I can be here for you now.
[Probably don't ever tell him that. He would probably march right up to Ignis and lay into him about something he hadn't even done yet.]
[ there's too much he wants to tell him in that moment. he wants to tell him about what had happened after altissia, about the train, about ardyn, about himself. he wants to tell him why he'd started wearing a wristband again, why it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with noct and ignis and maybe even lunafreya. he'd thought he'd gotten over that, had had time to accept these things and live with them, and before, after everyone had known the truth, it hadn't been a big deal. now, being here where he's the only one that remembers... it's hard. he absolutely hates keeping secrets from noct; not only because they're friends but because they're best friends. but what else is he supposed to do?
prompto doesn't say much for almost a minute, giving noct a gentle nudge instead to acknowledge what he's said before finally speaking up. ]
I should be the one giving you compliments, you know. It's your birthday. [ but it'd be closer to telling noct how much he loves him than anything else. ] Is there anything you wanna do later? I bet Iggy's gonna make you a cake.
[ normal conversations. that's what they both need right now. ]
[Noctis wants, desperately, to know all of those things. Wants to know what happens after their timelines diverge. Wants to know everything so he can look Prompto in the eye and tell him that it doesn't matter. That he's not crazy. That whatever they tried to make him into doesn't matter. Because he's Prompto. Noctis' best friend in any timeline. In any world. Always at each other's sides. That he would accept and love him not in spite of his truth, but because of it.
But he doesn't ask. Because Prompto changed the subject and maybe that is what they need right now.]
Mm, I don't know. Just to spend time with you guys, I guess. [Like there was anyone else he was gonna spend the day with.] Maybe those tacos Iggy makes. And you could show me more of your pictures.
[ prompto squeezes his eyes shut and snuggles down into the pillow for a second, thinking it over. when noct's birthday had rolled around last year, it had been a little easier to accept that he probably wasn't coming back, but he'd spent most of the night staring at all the pics he'd taken of them on their trip anyway, wishing he was irresponsible enough to get drunk so he'd forget about it. but maybe doing stuff like this is meant to make up for those lonely days and nights, humming out a quiet sound in response. ]
I'll show you all of 'em if that's what you want. I didn't really delete any after – [ he lifts his shoulder in a shrug. after he'd disappeared into the crystal. ] Not even the bad ones.
[All of it is still so fresh. So clear inside of his mind that all he really has to do is close his eyes to see everything. But. He's afraid. Afraid he'll forget what Gladio looks like. What Cindy and Iris and Aranea look like. How they sound. Already the memory of his father is starting to become hazy around the edges, and he's so desperate to hold on to all of them.
He's thankful now. For all of those times Prompto stopped them along the way and wanted to get pictures of them together. He wishes he had said 'yes' more.] Dude, at least half of them are probably just me getting on and off a chocobo. Did you really need that many?
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broplaints) wrote2019-06-18 07:33 pm
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Dude, it's me
What's up? Having a hard time sleeping?
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the prince of sleep is awake
you got me 😝
but yeah i guess
i was just going through some pics
thinking about home and other stuff
[ there's a long pause before he says anything else, staring hard at the pics on his camera and practically aching from the sight of them. back home, he'd started looking at them sometimes when he felt homesick or lonely, but after a while, he couldn't bring himself to do it. not when it meant remembering that noct was gone and the world was a hellscape. ]
happy birthday noct
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I like it 🤔
Think I'm gonna make that my official title
Dude
I didn't know you still had all of those
You should show me sometime
[Wait.
Wait.
It wasn't his birthday, was it? He looks at the date in his tablet and...
... Yeah. It's definitely his birthday.]
Thanks, Prom
But you know
It's been my birthday for a whole hour
And I've gotten zero presents
no subject
guess i'll have to change your name in my contacts list then
[ because he asked, prompto sends one where he's scrawled happy birthday along the top with the pen function. and the next few messages he gets cause him to snort a little. ]
i could probably give you something
i'd just have to get creative about it
unless you wanna tell me what you want
no subject
What do you have me as now?
[Okay honestly? That's the best present he ever could have gotten. He instantly saves it, and makes it the background on his tablet. They all look so happy. And that's how he wants to remember their journey. For all the good times. Not for how it ended.]
You just did
It's kind of chilly tonight though
I could use some help keeping warm
no subject
[ he's just kidding though. it's actually just 'noct' – plain and simple. and if he likes that pic, he's got a bunch of others he'll have to edit and send to him. maybe tomorrow though, glancing up from his seat in the direction of the room noct is resting in. ]
are you asking me to cuddle you??
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I feel so called out right now
[Prompto may be in his phone as 'bff ☀️📷'.]
You have five minutes before I go find Iggy
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it's cool
[ and prompto sighs, tapping out a quick reply before reaching over and gathering his lantern to get up and head for noct's room. ]
yeah yeah
stay in bed birthday boy
i'll be there in like two seconds
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[Actually that's a lie. He moves little. Enough to make room for Prompto to lay in the bed next to him. To give up half of his pillow. Clearly someone is feeling generous tonight.
And worried. Really, really worried.]
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Man, you weren't kidding. It is a little cold in here. [ he whispers it, gently nudging noct as he settles in. ]
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He's stolen an extra blanket from somewhere and thrown it over the bed, so it's at least pretty cozy once Prom slips under the covers. It helps with Noct arches into him, the response almost instant.]
Yeah. Plus it's... kind of hard to fall asleep by myself now after spending all that time squished in with you guys.
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On the bright side, at least we're not sleeping in a tent on the cold, hard ground. [ sharing noct's one pillow is going to get tricky if he isn't careful about where he rests his head. he gives noct's side a squeeze. ] Better?
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But the habit was so hard for Noctis to break. Especially when he didn't have the aid of Prompto being ripped from him. There had never been anything such as personal space between them. They were always all over each other.]
And we don't have to listen to Gladio snore. [His own arm loops around Prompto's waist and he shifts closer. Just a bit. Just enough so they can make each other in the darkness.] I'm sorry I left you alone, Prom. But I'm here.
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Noct... [ what does he say? what should he say? it's fine, i'm probably crazy anyway doesn't seem like a good thing to blurt out, and he miraculously catches himself before he does. ] You don't have to be sorry. I still had the others. We were doing okay.
[ barely. and he couldn't even remember when the last time was he'd seen ignis and gladio, but that's something he definitely doesn't want to tell noct. ]
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Was it even really his fault? Since when had he ever been in control of which path fate forced him down? Maybe it was selfish to feel so responsible for the deaths of those he loved. To feel like he had failed.
Had failed to save Luna. Had been so weak that Ignis had sacrificed himself in some last ditch attempt to save him. Hadn't been there for Prompto when the darkness came and he needed him most.
And he wants to say all of that. But he doesn't. Because it probably isn't the right time. And it probably never will be.]
I know how strong you are, Prompto. I'm just... really glad I can be here for you now.
[Probably don't ever tell him that. He would probably march right up to Ignis and lay into him about something he hadn't even done yet.]
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prompto doesn't say much for almost a minute, giving noct a gentle nudge instead to acknowledge what he's said before finally speaking up. ]
I should be the one giving you compliments, you know. It's your birthday. [ but it'd be closer to telling noct how much he loves him than anything else. ] Is there anything you wanna do later? I bet Iggy's gonna make you a cake.
[ normal conversations. that's what they both need right now. ]
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But he doesn't ask. Because Prompto changed the subject and maybe that is what they need right now.]
Mm, I don't know. Just to spend time with you guys, I guess. [Like there was anyone else he was gonna spend the day with.] Maybe those tacos Iggy makes. And you could show me more of your pictures.
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I'll show you all of 'em if that's what you want. I didn't really delete any after – [ he lifts his shoulder in a shrug. after he'd disappeared into the crystal. ] Not even the bad ones.
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He's thankful now. For all of those times Prompto stopped them along the way and wanted to get pictures of them together. He wishes he had said 'yes' more.] Dude, at least half of them are probably just me getting on and off a chocobo. Did you really need that many?